Let's Be Honest about being a parent!

Let's be honest, I'm no cusser, but parenting makes me want to be sometimes.  Supermom looks like she's got it all together at Walmart, but after 6 soccer matches and ballet, she's hitting communion pretty hard.  Crap, I don't EVER look like I've got it together at the grocery store.  People think I have turrets or I'm speaking in tongues, because I try to yell without yelling through clinched teeth. You know what I'm talking about. There are times we can't figure out if our kids are ADHD, or they have hearing loss, and of our neighbors think we are all hard of hearing.

But we keep plugging along.  We love our bundles of joy.  They bring us joy, laughter, tears, growth, but let's be honest, sometimes all the bring us is a big ole headache.

Parenting isn't for the weak and there are some of you saying, we chose to be parents and for that reason you don't get to complain.  I call bull, for that very reason I get to complain, and granted it's not even a complaint, it's just a statement of fact, but what's hard is not what you'd think.

It's not about changing diapers, or cleaning up vomit at 2am.  It's not even when you feel ignored or disrespected. It's about when you go to sleep at night, and you pray that you lived out Proverbs 22:6.

Train up a child in the way he should go, and when he is old, he will not stray from it.

It isn't showing restrain or patience. It's hoping that when your children look back on their lives they don't see their mom as being stressed or frustrated, or that daddy was goofy, and angry.

The hardest part about being a parents is hoping that every aspect of your life reflected Christ.

Let's be honest, parenting is crazy hard, but be encouraged that you are not alone in this endeavor.  God has given you the skills, and the gifting to handle it.  In the hard times, look to Philippians 4:6

Do not be anxious about anything but in everything by prayer and supplication with Thanksgiving, let your requests be made known to God.

 Or Matthew 6:34

Do not worry about tomorrow for tomorrow will care for itself.  Each day, has enough trouble of it's own.

In our worry, and frustration we need to not look in ourselves but to God.  Your children are still going to go crazy in the grocery store.  They will still be able to tune you out 3 inches away from them.

But let's be honest, we wouldn't trade them for the world.

Dreams are moving!!!

It's crazy....the culmination of plans, upon plans, upon plans, is finally coming to fruition!  Two years ago, when we started this journey to reinvent the Blackwells, we had several goals in mind. First and foremost, above all, focus our family to follow Christ wholeheartedly, in all things. With that, we wanted this life to be an adventure in Christ, in living fully, and stepping out on faith. As many of you know, on March 16, 2013, we lost Robin's twin brother in a motorcycle accident. One thing that Zach's death taught us is that tomorrow is not promised, so we need to go where we feel called today, not tomorrow!
Over the last year, we've sold our house, we've prayed, bought an airstream and truck, prayed, and applied for teaching jobs, and prayed!  It's funny you make plans and you pray about them and pray about them and pray about them, but sometimes flesh and a cynical nature doesn't expect it to actually happen, yet God is always faithful!  When you pray for something, and that's His plan for your life, He is going to open the doors!
The Blackwells are moving to Nashville Tennessee!!!  God opened the doors and we are taking the adventure!  Stephen will be teaching 8th grade math  and pursuing songwriting!  We don't know where this adventure will lead, but we do know we are stepping out on faith and trusting God to lead. We don't want to look back on our life and say, "well at least we played it safe", we want to say, "what a ride God took us on!"  Like any good family of 2016, we are going to document this adventure online!  So if you would like to keep up with us, follow our new YouTube channel, Facebook page, Instagram page and blog, all called:  Reinventing the Blackwells.  There will be videos, pictures and stories about living tiny in our Airstream (did I mention that!!??:). adventures in teaching in Tennessee versus Texas, songwriting, navigating a new city, and most importantly this adventure of following Christ wholeheartedly to see where he takes us next!
Thank you for joining us and please keep watching and reading.....and, we ask you to pray for us and our boys!  Nashville is Music City, so every time you turn on your radio, scan Pandora, worship at church, play an instrument, please say a prayer for us in Nashville!  We love you all!  What will your reinvention be?

Stephen will be playing at:

Mill Creek in Canton on Friday, June 17th from 6-9pm

Smoke Monkey BBQ on 205 on Saturday, June 18th from 7-10pm

Leading worship at Stonepoint's Edgewood Campus on Sunday, March 19th at 10:30

Then we hit the road on June 24th for Nashville!

Lego My Potential!

My oldest son is quite the artist, especially for a 7 year old, and with that talent comes great confidence in his ability.  Unfortunately, when he is in Art class, that confidence contributes to doing his own thing instead of listening to the teacher.  

While I want him to have confidence, I don’t want him to miss out on getting better because he doesn’t think he needs to learn new techniques.  He has a stubborn streak a mile wide that he comes by naturally from both his mother and me, which often leads to not listening to us when trying new foods or experiences.  So this morning after a meltdown during lunch, a conversation about potential came about.  

We had built some spaceships with legos and they were still out and on the floor of the living room.  Big D asked what potential was, so I went and grabbed a handful of legos.  I said,”These legos have potential to be a cool spaceship, if I choose to put them together.  Potential is for nothing if we don’t act on it.”

I then told him we are like a single lego brick, we have the potential to be a part of something great, or we have the potential to get lost under the couch. To be a part of something great, we often need others to help us build on who we are.  Yes we need to be who God made us to be, BUT that often takes listening to others, even when we think we have the answers.  

Even as adults, we let potential get lost under the couch, because we get too busy working a job, or checking Facebook, or reading blogs (oh the irony.)  I believe that we all have potential to do great things. God has given us life and gifts and talents, and I don’t believe His plan was to give us these things so that they can sit on the bench. 

Ultimately, God is the master builder.  We hear this from King David in Psalm 139:13-15.  HE created our inmost being, HE knit us together in our mother’s womb,  we ARE fearfully and wonderfully made. He builds upon our lives, so that we can be a part of greater things and sometimes He builds on our lives using others, to teach us, to guide us, to love us, to make us stronger.

So back to my lesson with D, I began to use bricks that represented some of the people that would potentially, positively influence his life, and I built a small plane.  I told him, if you listen to those that teach and want to help you, you will create more awesome things, experience cooler adventures, and be a part of something greater than you could ever imagine.  

As we have been Reinventing the Blackwells, potential has awakened in our lives.  We are no longer going to sit by and let it pass or sit and sour.  WE  have chosen to allow God  to build upon our lives, we are listening, and ready for the new experiences God is bringing to us.

Remember the Bull

The Bull

We just got back from an amazing vacation. We travelled from East Texas to New Mexico, to Colorado.  Our first stop on our trip out west was Glorieta, NM, an encampment Robin and I grew up going to for youth camp.  This time, we went to Family Camp, a camp put together by the people of Glorieta geared towards families as a whole.  It was amazing; there were tons of different outdoorsy things to do; like mountain biking, mountain scootering, archery tagging, and much, much more.  Every night we had worship, and every morning we had bible study and family time.  We made wonderful new friendships that I'm confident will last a lifetime.  They even snuck in a date night for the parents.  It was truly one of the coolest experiences we, as a family, have ever been a part of.  I would undoubtedly advise anyone given the chance to go to Glorieta, go!  We grew closer as a family, and learned more so to trust God in all things.

On Thursday, they threw us a hootenanny of sorts, with tons of games, and BBQ, on the side of a mountain near a big red barn.  As I was walking around, keeping an eye and ear out for my children, I saw the coolest stick gun ever, simply a stick that had the perfect shape to be used as a pistol, and so I picked it up and put it in my pocket.  Daily at Family camp, we would have a craft to do with our children to help bring the lesson home.  This particular day, we had to create burden blocks.  Basically, we would write our worries, our concerns, and/or our burdens on this wooden block then carry it with us all day.  It was a symbol of how the things we senselessly worry about hold us back or weigh us down.  At the end of the hootenanny, there was a ceremony to burn our blocks, to represent giving our cares to God. Well my oldest gets attached to things quickly, especially if it is something he created.  So just like his drawings, he got attached to this block.  He all out refused to burn the block, to the point of almost making a scene, and it got worse, he didn’t want us to burn our blocks either.  I took a knee beside him, and told him that these blocks represent pain that is keeping us from our best.  Which reminded me of how WE as adults are with our burdens, as if to say we don’t want to give up our pain that we KNOW, in exchange for the future we don’t know. 

Sometimes it’s laziness that keeps us from our best but other times it’s fear.  Fear that we don’t know what’s next.  Fear that the next step will be hard, or take us out of our comfort zone.  With much reluctance, Dodge finally came to the fire pit. Away from the fire, I told him he didn’t have to throw it in, but that I really thought he should.  I threw mine in, and then Truett followed suit, as well as Robin.  Then I looked over and saw Dodge sitting closer to the fire, and could tell he was thinking about letting go.  So he looked at the fire, and went to toss the block, and the string caught his finger and the block went behind his head.  I thought for certain that was it, but he went, picked it up and tossed it in. I pulled him aside immediately and hugged him and told him how proud I was of him. You could tell he was upset, and then I remembered the AWESOME stick gun in my pocket.  I pulled it out and handed it too him.  I told him, “ This is The Bull, the gun that killed the evil mountain goat.” He grinned from ear to ear.  I then told him, Dodge this represents what happens when we give God our burdens.  He replaces it with good. 

It was an amazing object lesson, which happened in the moment.   Pretty cool how God works.  To finish out the week we had to come up with a family motto, so we painted, Trust God All Things, then off to the side, Remember the Bull.  I asked Dodge a couple of days ago, what that meant, and he told me that it represents that when we trust God in everything and give him the hard stuff, he’ll take care of us.

God is bigger than our burdens, and sometimes we don’t realize just what that means.  Until we fully realize that, we’ll never fully experience what God has in store. 

 Thank you Glorieta staff, and Josh Baker, y’all were a blessing!

Check them out at Glorieta.org.

Sleep is a gift from God too!

This may come as a surprise to my family and friends, but I am not a morning person. I know, I know, I am always so cheerful in the morning, right???  I should be on Good Morning, America!  Maybe this isn't completely true....I'm not sure I hide my disdain for getting out of bed so well...  As soon as he hears me stirring, my husband pours the coffee and holds it outstretched, looking at the ground, avoiding eye contact...I thought he was just being sweet, but it may be due to my winning morning attitude....

Mornings are a blessing from God, so why do I have such a hard time with them???  Well, one reason is, I am a night owl.  I get it from my mom. I do believe we both could clean an entire house, finish a school project and write a blog all after 8 pm!  This, however, does not make for a chipper morning. My husband looks at me like I'm crazy when I get a burst of energy when he is ready for sleep.  I would rather tackle a big project after I put the kids to bed, he would rather start it before they wake up!  Over the years we have learned to split it up when we can. He takes morning shift, I take the evening.

I have had people try to make me feel guilty for liking/needing sleep and/or staying up late and then sleeping in, but I'm over it now. This is how I function. However, I will admit, there have been times I have gotten up early and experienced a beautiful sunrise, time with God before the kids are up, prayer time with my man, and extra coffee!

Therefore, in the spirit of reinvention I am going to be transparent with you. All you crazy morning people, don't judge me!  This summer, I will (try) to actually be out of bed by 8 am. You thought I was going to say 6 am, but let's not get crazy, it is summer, after all!!!  Stephen will already be up, (how did I marry a morning person???:). We want to have our bible study and prayer time together, in the mornings this summer. We want to have time together to plan, pray and talk alone and with our boys. They will be in on family bible study too. We usually do this in the evenings, but we are going to attempt mornings!

Stephen wants to workout in the mornings too, but let's take this one sleepy step at a time...  And, thank you Stephen, for loving your night-owl!

Sleep is a blessing too!
Ecclesiastes 5:12
People who work hard, sleep well!

Mornings!
Psalm 143:8
Let me hear from your unfailing love each morning, for I am trusting you.  Show me where to walk, for I give myself to you.

My new mantra....I will.

Yesterday I ran!  Well, jogged and walked... No one was chasing me, except two cute little boys, not random boys, they belong to me.  There wasn't an emergency or anything!  And, today I am sore. I mean, even my feet are sore.  I didn't know that was possible!  I was an athlete back in the day. I remember being sore after a tough workout or long day of tennis, but nothing like approaching 40, overweight, haven't exercised consistently in a very long time kinda sore! 
In reinventing the Blackwells, we realize that it must include all areas of our life, thus the exercise.
Spiritual exercise can be the same. Opening your bible and reading daily, praying with purpose, and seeking God's face can make you spiritually sore, whether you are out of practice or not.  But, oh the rewards will be evident and abundant!  My new mantra is, " I will". I will read, I will study and I will pray over God's word.  I will run, er....jog/walk...  I will NOT make excuses. 
I am physically and spiritually sore!  I am pushing through to be transformed!  Will you join me?
Today...I will, again. 

Romans 12:1-2
1 Therefore, I urge you brothers and sisters, in view of God's mercy, to offer your bodies as a living sacrifice, holy and pleasing to God-this is your true and proper worship.
2 Do not conform to the patterns of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is-His good pleasing and perfect will.

Jim Croce, Cyndi Lauper, and The Rolling Stones walk into a bar... and all they can talk about is time.

As Robin mentioned in the last post, our world over the last 2 years has been rocked, and not in a good way.  But in the last 6 months we’ve been working on moving back toward some normalcy.  For instance, we took last year off of youth sports, and now we are getting the boys involved in some extra curricular activities.  

Our youngest is old enough to start soccer this year, so we plan on getting him and our oldest plugged in to that.  Our oldest signed up for Tae Kwon Doe, Piano, and Basketball.  From the beginning of both TKD and Piano, he has been knockin’ it out, figuratively speaking.  He just has a natural talent for both.  Basketball is another story all together.  When we started, he couldn’t dribble, couldn’t catch a pass, and is truthfully not extremely aggressive, but he does have a natural shot. In basketball though, if you can’t dribble or catch a pass, the likelihood of getting a shot is slim. What we’ve learned is with our busy schedule, it is hard to find time for us to work on basketball.  

The fact that he doesn’t know how to dribble or catch a pass is on me.  I was emotionally scarred in youth sports growing up.  I had coaches that played favorites, and cared only about winning, as opposed to truly teaching fundamentals that younger children need to learn.  Don’t get me wrong, I like winning, but I like playing even more.  So, I let that curb a lot of my enthusiasm for youth sports, I was at the point that I didn’t care if my kids ever played.  Now this blog isn’t about the evils of youth sports,  in fact overall they are good for kids.  This is about my error.  You see the error that I found, was that you can’t find time.  Finding time means, if there is anything left at the end of the day we’ll use that.  What I was seeing was at the end of the day, there was none.  It would either be too dark, too cold, or I’d be too tired.  Then I had a revelation, I needed to make time, not just find it, because I was becoming skilled at finding more excuses than time.

So Monday hit, we have TKD on Mondays, so it’s easy to say we’ve already done something that day, but I decided to ask if he wanted to shoot hoops when we got home. He said yes.  We spent the next hour working on drills. We shot, we laughed, we dribbled, and we passed.  He is getting it.  He’s working hard, and wants to go do that rather than just sit inside and watch TV.  We did the same thing yesterday.  I saw that putting in the practice is helping him to develop.  It’s all about making time.  Then I was hit by another revelation.  Am I making enough time for God?  

Like I said in the beginning, and what our title entails, we are reinventing the Blackwells, and sometimes I have to reevaluate hard things in my life.  I have to admit to mistakes and things that are improperly prioritized.  I get up early everyday, I leave the house by 6 so I can be at work by 7, and then I usually get home by about 4:30.  Then I leave to go take Dodge to TKD.  Then we get home by 6 and usually eat dinner. Play, give baths, and go to bed.  I was struggling to find time to spend with God and we know what happens when we try to find time.  It sounds coarse and irreverent to say I have to make time for God.  A few years back if I read this very blog, and that statement, I would be indignant at someone that “finally decided to make time for God.”  As a Christian, we know that God is our reason for life, so why aren’t we making that time?  I spend time in worship, I spend time in prayer, but as a human I have to make a conscious effort to spend time in the Bible and alone with God.  It’s all about being intentional with our love and walk with God.  Just like I have to be intentional with my walk with my sons.  I have to teach them the fundamentals of basketball, because they are not going to miraculously wake up one morning and know every skill.  I have to be intentional with helping around my home, I can’t say we need to clean the house then go take a nap and expect the cleaning fairies to have made my house spotless.  And in the same way, I can’t expect growth in my relationship with God, if I don’t intentionally listen and put time, and effort into what my savior has for me. Hosea 6:3 says it best:

“So let us know, let us press on to know the Lord.
His going forth is as certain as the dawn;
And He will come to us like the rain,
Like the spring rain watering the earth.”